Three Persons Who Drifted Away

Carl Yeargens had helped Prabhupada in times of need.  He had helped with the legal work of incorporating ISKCON, signed the ISKCON charter as a trustee, and even opened his home to Swamiji when David had driven him from the Bowery loft.  But those days when he and Eva had shared their apartment with him had created a tension that had never left.  He liked the Swami, he respected him as a genuine sannyasi from India, but he didn’t accept the conclusions of the philosophy.  The talk about Krishna and the soul was fine, but the idea of giving up drugs and sex was carrying it a little too far.  Now Prabhupada was settled in his new place and Carl decided that he had done his part to help and was no longer needed.  Although he had helped Prabhupada incorporate his International Society for Krishna Consciousness, he didn’t want to join it.

Carl found the Second Avenue kirtanas too public, not like the more intimate atmosphere he had enjoyed with the Swami on the Bowery.  Now the audiences were larger, and there was an element of wild letting loose that they had never had on the Bowery.  Like some of the other old associates, Carl felt sheepish and reluctant to join in.  In comparison to the Second Avenue street scene, the old meetings in the fourth-floor Bowery loft had seemed more mystical, like secluded meditations.

Carol Bekar also preferred a more sedate kirtana.  She thought people were trying to take out their personal frustrations by the wild singing and dancing.  The few times she did attend evening kirtanas on Second Avenue were “tense moments.”  One time a group of teenagers had come into the storefront mocking and shouting, “Hey!  What the hell is this!”  She kept thinking that at any moment a rock was going to come crashing through the big window.  And anyway, her boyfriend wasn’t interested.

James Greene felt embarrassed.  He saw that most of the new men were making a serious commitment to the Swami, whereas he could not.  He had no bad feeling toward the Swami and his new movement, but he preferred to live alone.