I Want to Celebrate All the Things in My Life Until Swamiji
I want to celebrate all the things in my life that led up to my meeting Srila Prabhupada. I am thankful to everything that happened. Thankful mainly that I survived. Recently I started thinking of the places I had lived in around 1964, 1965; rehashing. After I got out of the Navy, I rented a tiny, slum apartment with no hot water down on Suffolk Street. After six months there, a real estate agent came to the door and said I had to leave; they were going to tear the building down. He helped me find another place, which was a real dump. It was one block north of Houston Street, more into the stream of things, in a predominantly Puerto Rican neighbourhood. It was a basement apartment without lights.
That summer I was like a young boy playing in a treehouse. I played at being a Lower East Side hipster with a part-time job; smoking marijuana, wasting my youth, very unhappy but playing a game of “forget by getting high”. Once again the real estate agent came to the door and said that I had to get out; they were going to use the building for something else.
I was so burned out from taking LSD and being hurt by “friends” that I moved back in with my parents on Staten Island. After that I got a job in the city on the Lower East Side. Then I almost killed myself during an LSD trip by jumping out a window. I broke both my heels falling from the fourth floor. After six weeks in casts I moved back again to Staten Island, to my own apartment. While still hobbling around on crutches, I decided that I wanted to get back into Manhattan where the action was. Staten Island was too far for me to travel to my job on Fifth Street in Manhattan. Actually, I was strategically placing myself for what was going to happen very soon – but I did not know it.
I remember the night I moved from Staten Island. I had some furniture from my boyhood room, a bed and a bureau, and I had to move it. I called up a freelance mover in Manhattan and they came and picked me up. I did not tell the landlord, but just checked out and brought two cats with me.
On the ferry I tried to act urbane and hip to impress the guys in the cab of the truck. It was night-time when we pulled into Suffolk Street. And there it was – the congested, steaming, passionate city. The air was filled with Spanish accents, music, and a violent atmosphere. As we pulled in front of the building one of the movers said, “Why are you moving here? You had such a nice, quiet place.”
The other mover said, “He wants to be part of the action, right? Staten Island is dead.”
I especially remember that moment with the two movers. The first guy’s remark had really hit it on the head: “Why is this young guy moving back to the city?” And as I relive that frightening and yet courageous move that I was making to try to get back into the action, searching for whatever I thought I could find in the city, suddenly I recall that that was the apartment I was in when I met Prabhupada!
If I had met an astrologer back then, and if he had been accurate in his reading, he would have looked at me knowingly and said, “Oh, you are about to meet a very special person, and he is going to make a momentous change in your life!” But I had no such anticipation.
That apartment on Suffolk Street, and the nearness of it to the time when I would meet Prabhupada – the fact that it was the place where I lived when I first met him and began to chant Hare Krishna under his direction – makes it very special in my personal history.